PACIFY ME!

One thing Martin and I have been “holding the energy on,” (a very Light Worker thing to say) is becoming grandparents. We need something to help fill a part of this HUGE void, gap, black hole, left in our lives by Andrew. We also knew that becoming grandparents may be a long shot with the near death, medical, trauma Elatia experienced 7 months prior to Andrew’s leukemia diagnosis. Losing an ovary to a rare ovarian tumor, then having cysts come and go on the remaining ovary is not a recipe for a pregnancy diagnosis. Elatia felt like she couldn’t get pregnant and that’s what we were counting on! Without her interfering, i.e. using birth control, it made our job a little easier. Oh the tangle web we weave!

We were always kidding Elatia about our cruise, we kept telling her that we were going as 4, but better be coming back as 5. Her last night in Dublin with us, she was in bed and said she didn’t come down to say good night because she was tired and had cramps. My heart sank. I knew what that meant. I went down stairs to Martin and informed him that we were coming home as 4! *grunt & huff & foot stomp* As you now know that was not the case at all, instead we went on the cruise as 5. Life can be funny sometimes, ok A LOT!

When we landed back in Belfast from Barcelona after our cruise and before Dublin, Martin was having a chat with Andrew. He told Andrew that he wanted a definite sign that we really do have a grandchild coming in at some point at least. Martin heard, “Look down Daddy.” Martin looks down at the curb where we were getting our “people mover” i.e. van, and saw a baby pacifier with a green hue! OMG! No denying that answer! And a green one to boot? Green being Andrew’s color, it was a definite sign/answer from him. What a great son Andrew is!

Martin was going to tell Elatia about the pacifier and I told him NO WAY! We don’t need to be scaring her! She might freak out! She might start using birth control or something, and we just can’t take that chance! (hmmmm boundary issue here perhaps?) While she was open to the idea of having a baby, planning one was not on her agenda. We had to keep the pacifier a secret…until July 13th that is, that’s when we spilled our guts about everything we had been doing since May. Like starting the journal to our grandchild, buying a few baby outfits and telling a few close friends & family members what I was getting about an incoming grandchild.

Martin and I are so excited to have a grandchild coming in, we can wait to see who they are and how we can help them be who they came here to be! This pacifies me!

IT’S ALL REALLY GOOD!